Old Grandma Hardcore

This blog is the chronicle of my experiences with Grandma, the video-game playing queen of her age-bracket and weight class. She will beat any PS2, XBox, GameCube, etc., console game put in front of her, just like she always has. These are her stories. She is absolutely real. She lives in Cleveland.

Saturday, December 02, 2006

Holiday Season 2006

Happy Holidays everybody! We have a lot to talk about. I'm sorry about the posting delay; my grandfather passed away the Friday after Thanksgiving. Ralph St. Hilaire was another cool older person in my life, a person who's personality and story could be deserving of a website all his own rather than just a blurb here. When one goes through the death of someone close, everything else in the world seems trite and inconsequential; not even the most popular forms of escapism- alcohol, video games, television, religion- could distract us from the ultimate memento mori, and mortality became the principle focus above all else.

But this isn't the place for that discussion. Far from it.

While it's difficult to segue to Grandma's thoughts on the console wars from such a subject, know that even while I waited at the hospital during the last moments of my grandfathers life on what, at the time, the rest of the country ironically called "Black Friday", the unnatural chatter flooding the ICU unit in Akron among nurses and people waiting to see their loved ones, hopefully in better conditions, was always about the same thing: who had called who to secure early morning deals at any number of BestBuys, Targets, Circuit Citys, and GameStops.

"My God," I thought. "It's come to this."

Of course, I was irrationally angry; angry that anyone could talk about something so stupid as PS3's, Wii's, PSP's, DS's and 360's while a man lays on a bed and dreams for the last time. But that was unfair.

Life goes on. It's too emotionally and physically exhausting to concentrate on the end. I know how fucking cliché and hollow that may sound, but one only learns through experiencing the consequences of failing to empathize.

Which brings us to this console war mess. In this country, the election in the beginning of November seemed only to set the tone of animosity that would finally show itself in the form of an all out Battle of The Fanboys. The negative campaign ads you saw during the election are quite tame to some of the shit you've probably read about The PS3 and The Wii in the past couple weeks.

Here are Grandma's thoughts:

To all the people who actually got either a PS3 or a Wii when they were released: fucking ENJOY THEM! I say- be happy! A lot of people think you're all a bunch of rich assholes who only snagged a new console because it's cool to be the first, but they don't know what it's like. You know what, you decided to pay a bit more for your system. You knew what to expect. You're adults, you can spend your money how you choose. Is it wrong to be that excited about a new game console? No! Not if you're responsible about it. Let's face it, you paid for the hype, and goddammit it felt good, didn't it! When you wait in the cold for 3 days and finally get that box home and open it up, or when you enter your credit card numbers on eBay and wait just a second before pressing Enter (knowing that bills are going to be a bit tight for awhile), it's only going to feel worth it if you WANT it to. So play on your new console! ENJOY IT!! Make your console worth every penny you paid and treat it well. If you don't, then what's the damn point?

But you probably already knew that part. What bugs me, and this is the second part, is please stop wishing that the company that makes the console you DIDN'T buy would go under. If you bought a PS3 why should you give a shit about the Wii unless you were planning to get one of those too? If you bought a Wii and you don't want to buy a PS3, then... who cares?! All you guys need to stop this shit. We're only telling you this because we love you guys and we want to see you get along! I don't mean that you can't criticize a crappy system, shit- you SHOULD do that, but at least be honest about it. You don't need to cheer when Sony releases a press release saying they aren't shipping the numbers they thought they would, we get it- you're a Nintendo fan. And Sony fans, don't announce the death of Nintendo when somebody busts their tv with a Wiimote because the strap broke!

I like Sony, I like Nintendo, I like Microsoft, hell- I like Atari, SNK and Sega, too. So I feel like I'm in the middle of a big family table and everyone hates each other and I end up being the one getting bored! If you think a game is crappy, tell me! If I think a game is crappy, you'd better be DAMNED sure I'm going to tell you! But neither you or me are doing it because we hate some fucking company, it's because the game sucks, right? I just think we're all gamers first, friends second, and I think "company stooge" is a lot farther down the line than that... somewhere like.. Thirty.

Anyway, that's all I wanted to say about that.


Also, an update on everyone's gaming status... Grandma's final time on Final Fantasy XII = 246 HOURS. People who said it was a short game didn't get everything, I assure you :) We'll have a full review up later this week. I'm still hurting myself trying to master everything in Guitar Hero II, and Grandma and I both are looking forward to Twilight Princess coming to the GameCube, as well as Lumines II for the PSP, Final Fantasy III for the DS, and (this one might surprise you) Lost Planet for the XBox 360. I know, I know- Grandma's not much of an FPS fan but for whatever reason she REALLY enjoyed the demo at the Capcom kiosk at E3.

In other news, Joe from Cleveland Scene Magazine is trying to start some shit :) Whadya mean "run-down two story?" We like our house! (Just fuckin' with ya' Joe, you know we love ya, dude!)

Also, Michelle Hinn is doing great things working with game designers to make games more accessible with people with disabilities. The first thing for which Grandma looks when she puts in a brand new game is the option to turn on subtitles. People in the industry are doing better when it comes to providing content for the hearing impaired, but there are a great many other disabilities that can prevent a lot of gamers out there from enjoying games as they are. Michelle is trying to remedy that. Score one for the rest of us!

Game on, everybody!


Rest in Peace, Grandpa- you keep riding, man.

16 Comments:

  • At 2:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Deeply sorry about your grandpa. Mine is still alive, and I hope he has many more years of life left in him. In any sense, I am nearly done with FFXII; my current game time is 125 hours, and I have completed all hunts, except for Yiazmat, defeated all espers, fought and defeated the Hell Wyrm, and still need to find the rest of the rare monsters and Omega.

    I have FFIII for the DS, and it is a nice nostalgia trip, very simplistic story and gameplay, but the job system is quite complex, and makes for a lot of interesting party combinations. I am also playing Yoshi's Island DS, which is very fun, though often frustrating.

    On PSP, I am playing Vice City Stories, and I plan on picking up MGS: Portable Ops when it comes out.

    Right now, I have having 360 overkill with Double Agent, Gears of War, FEAR, Call of Duty 3, and Marvel Ultimate Alliance that all still need to be beaten. I am eagerly awaiting Twilight Princess on the Cube, and also want to pick up Castlevania: Portrait of Ruin for the DS when it comes out.

    I also want Lost Planet, as it looks really awesome. Has grandma considered playing Enchanted Arms for the 360? Not a great RPG, but quite good nonetheless, especially for RPG fans. 25 easy achievements for her is she plays it.

     
  • At 11:23 PM, Blogger Ambience-Studios said…

    sorry to hear about your grandpa i know what you are going through i lost my grandma to cancer last year and now my grandfather almost lost his life and is still in bad shape, lol the black friday was horrible my fiancee works at best buy and had to work it, as for the PS3 alot of ppl buy them just to resll on ebay there was one that went for over 13,000 now thats just plain desperate and dumb, and the PS3 was already having heating issues it would play for a couple of hors and shut itself off due to overheating.
    let me know if you guys need some help in the disabled gaming stuff because i would love to help out i know how it is i went from playing games with two hands to havingto teach myself to play with one hand after a stroke at the age of 18.
    paine21 (Gayla)

     
  • At 12:39 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    ::hug:: Very sorry to hear around your Grandpa - Josiah and my thoughts are with you, and we send out good wishes and positive juju to you guys. I know what you mean about that moment - I guess... we go back to what comforts us and convinces us things will go on again. When I lost my grandpa, and my family gathered for the funeral, we took time to watch The Princess Bride, and I'd do an impression of the priest ("Wuv... twoo wuv...") when my cousins seemed to get too grim. Just being able to laugh and smile for a bit sort of pulled us back to the present, and kept us remembering the good things about our grandpa, and not fixating on our loss.

    Anyhow. Hugs to all of you guys - and let me know if you want any support for the disabled gaming work: one of my co-workers is a brilliant and talented guy who doesn't have much use of his hands and arms (he can't play many console games due to this) but he can design games like a madman (a talented madman! ::chuckle::) I'd love to see more games become accessible to him and others with similar disabilities - cutting anyone out of gaming makes the Annie sad.

    Ooo, finally: I myself have a Wii (and it is WICKEDLY fun!) and we got a PS3 at work - if you want some firsthand feedback from a few titles, let me know and I'll give you the lowdown ::grin:: And seriously - someone has to hook you up with these titles! Someone better get MTV on the phone... the OGHC, unable to review next-gen titles? UNTHINKABLE! ::laugh::

    Take care, be well, all my best to you and yours, and - as always - GAME ON!

    -A!

     
  • At 1:16 PM, Blogger Ambience-Studios said…

    i say to grandma wait for a conole wait for the bugs to be worked out of them especially on the PS3 i am a fan of both nintendo and sony but as of late sonys console have sucked ass the ps2 had so many probs when it came out, my fiancees bro had to take is ps2 back twice within the first week it was out. and the sadness of the ppl getting their ps3 is that some ppl lost their lives because of greedy ppl a guy cant rem which state lost his life when ppl try to take his money standing in line when he refused and fought back he was shot in th chest. i hope they fnd the ppl who shot him and give them the most harsh punishments. even if they are kids

     
  • At 12:10 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    sorry to hear about your grandpa. my grandpa went the same way. it was a big shock to us though. he was talking and eating one night and 2 nights later he was gone. i understand how hard it is to lose someone that way.

     
  • At 9:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I'm really really sorry to hear about Grandpa St. Hilaire (now permanently named in my mind as Grandpa Hardcore). It sucks when someone you love dies. I have to say this though - if you had a good enough relationship with your grandpa to be mourning when he's gone, then I think that's a good thing.

    I agree with Joe - someone should be getting Grandma a PS3 or Wii already!! How is she supposed to review the games and do her job for MTV if she doesn't have the damn consoles?? C'mon Tim, put up a Paypal button. Swear to God, we all WANT to contribute to Grandma's Christmas/birthday presents. We do! (Well, I sure as hell do.)

    Game on, and may your grandpa be rocking heaven to the ground. :-)
    Jen

     
  • At 10:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I forgot to say it in my comment just above, but I'm really glad that Michelle Hinn is going to bat for us disabled gamers. I'm not a quadriplegic or anything of that severity, but I tend to rely very heavily on subtitles in games like Grandma does, and other things like that. It's good to know that someone is taking on the creators and making them aware that we do, in fact, exist.

     
  • At 12:29 PM, Blogger Candy the Pomeranian said…

    Family comes first, never be sorry for that!

    All the best to you and your family.

    Happy Holidays (Merry Christmas)

     
  • At 12:39 PM, Blogger Candy the Pomeranian said…

    I concur with Jen, post a Paypal button/link, and/or post a P.O. Box so we can send you things, maybe a console.

     
  • At 3:52 PM, Blogger Zodiak said…

    Greetings Tim and Grandma,

    Sorry for the loss, especially right around the holiday season :(

    I was on line for a Wii and met some fantastic people picking up consoles, games, and extra Wiimotes. The line was in an orderly fashion and nobody got robbed/hurt over it. (check out my blog title "United Wii Stand" for the whole deal). But it was great only having to stay outside for 30 minutes.

    But right now it's more grieving and getting over it than games. So if you missed out on a next-gen console, no worries cause I'm sure there will be more in stock after the year is up.

    Take care, god bless.

    -Zodiak

    P.S. Get Grandma a Wii so we can play her online when Wii Play comes out..should be fun to see her play with the Wiimote. :)

     
  • At 5:40 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    My condolences on your loss. My great grandmother died last month. It puts things like fanboy wars and console shortages in perspective. I'd rather have my great grandmother back than a Wii.

    Thanks for the link concerning video game accessibility -- it's something I've been wondering about lately. I'm a part time web designer, and one thing I know very well is that when you make a product more accessible for the handicapped, it becomes more accessible for ALL users. I, for example, have fine hearing, but I like to play my video games late at night, so I have to keep the volume turned down, and if there's no subtitles I have no idea what's going on. It's not just deaf gamers who need the subtitles.

     
  • At 4:07 PM, Blogger Unknown said…

    my heart goes out to you and grams tim. wishing you all the best during the holidays, i know it'll be tough.

    loved grams letter. if that doesn't get them to shut up forget about it! lol

    recently my nephew has been playing those old games that come with the cheapy little controllers. the kind you buy at toys r us for 20 bucks. he's moving up from the itelplay and all those learning games for baby's. it's tough when by now i expected to be getting in some serious game time with my nephew. he's almost 8 and he's autistic. a couple of years ago i tried to get him a gameboy, but since i'm not around him all the time it was too hard. he played it, but i just didn't get him the right type of games. i wouldn't know where to begin either...

    anyway, the point is that i'd love to see more video games geared towards children with disabilities like my nephews.

     
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