Old Grandma Hardcore

This blog is the chronicle of my experiences with Grandma, the video-game playing queen of her age-bracket and weight class. She will beat any PS2, XBox, GameCube, etc., console game put in front of her, just like she always has. These are her stories. She is absolutely real. She lives in Cleveland.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Grandma's Anime Conundrum

Leggo My Eggo!!We live in an anime/manga enabling house. The kids all dig Adult Swim and the classic subs, I've always had a soft spot for good animation, story and art, and Grandma has always loved the anime enriched RPG's. The problem lies in the connotations that anime has come to invoke.

She tries so hard, sometimes. She'll pound out 15 straight hours of Growlanser or Xenosaga without blinking an eye, then walk into the living room while me and the boys are putting in our share to the Ghost In The Shell or Neon Evangelion Genesis appreciation hour and scream out "you're letting them watch THIS?? Her TITS are hanging out!"

See, what Grandma enjoys, she doesn't consider anime. If she likes it, it somehow transforms its designation of "cartoon porn" directly to "beautiful art." That isn't to say she hasn't watched and enjoyed a few in her time. Recently (say, in the past six months or so), she's enjoyed Vamipre Hunter D, Tokyo Godfathers, and Spirited Away (although while not necessarily beloved in the anime community, all great movies in their own right). But, so help you- don't you DARE call them "anime."

So why is this? Is it because of my brother Josh telling her all about the "great classic" known as Golden Boy? Is it because of the dirty, unsettling feeling one gets from seeing countless nursing home ISP's on the site's log list coming across OGHC searching for unspeakable acts against nature? Or is it all because of a kid shopping at a GameStop so many years ago wearing a My Neighbor Totoro shirt who told her in no uncertain terms that Final Fantasy was for "posers?" [Side note: To that kid, if you still live around Akron and you ever read this, my Grandma could kick your ASS at any Gundam game you choose.]


All this brings us to Growlanser Generations, which Grandma is thoroughly enjoying. I have read that if you don't like anime, you won't like Growlanser. Three days ago, I would have agreed with this statement. Grandma:

"He looks like a GIRL! What's his name? WEIN? Why is he wearing a headband?"

"These people look fucking STRANGE. Why are the names German? This is not Germany."


G- "Okay, how do I equip different rings?"

me- "Um... it looks like the only way you can is to go to a town that has a Ring Artisan and pay to have them equip you."

G- "Well that's STUPID, it's a fucking ring, not an elaborate weapon that has to be synthesized..."

me- "You got the ring from a floating blob. Perhaps it was fitted for the blob's finger, so the artisan has to change the size for you."

G- "That makes more sense. ....wait- blobs don't have fingers."

me- "Don't they?"


She has gotten a whole lot better at strategy since then, and now she's instructing me on things. I'm thinking about popping in the second disc, Growlanser III, on my PS2 in the living room so we can both play our games obsessively without getting in the way of each other. I have to finish up FarCry Instincts and Brothers in Arms first, but we might as well just game away without any rigid system, as long as we finish the games we enjoy.

So, for that reason, Grandma is playing Growlanser II, The Suffering: Ties That Bind, and Resident Evil 4 for nostalgia's sake. I'm playing Brothers in Arms: Road To Hill 30, FarCry Instincts, and Growlanser III.

We also eat occasionally.


--More on the way! We're adding some more folks to our Ultimate Kickass Blogroll tonight, so make sure you check it out. T-Shirts and Hoodies will be available soon with your artwork in the selections at the store (finally, I know... I'm a lazy person) and we have some more stuff on our friend Jack Thompson and a new Press section, because you requested it and we will jump quite high when you say so :) Thanks guys!--

17 Comments:

  • At 2:17 PM, Anonymous Anne Packrat said…

    If she liked Tokyo Godfathers then check out Paranoia Agent and definitely Millenium Actress. Both are by the same director. Millenium Actress is one of the best movies I've ever seen. You might be able to rent it at Blockbuster.
    (And both are low or nonexistent on breast count.)

     
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  • At 3:23 PM, Blogger Mike said…

    hey - saw a link on business week...
    my hats off to you....

     
  • At 3:52 PM, Blogger Collin said…

    What do you think of FarCry Instincts? I wasn't terribly impressed by the demo, but sometimes that's not a good way to judge the final product.

    I did finally play the demo of Shadow of the Colossus on Monday. That's next on my "must get" list, but unless I use trades it'll not be 'til after Christmas.

     
  • At 5:11 PM, Anonymous Kirsha said…

    Oh boy, then dont let her know that the character designer for the Growlancer games is Satoshi Urushihara, a very famous artist, known for his fascination with drawing breasts.

    Love it! =D

     
  • At 6:14 PM, Blogger The Burnt Pizza said…

    when do i get my fucking oghc hoodie!!!!!!!!!!

     
  • At 7:34 PM, Blogger HandOverFist said…

    I'm not much of an anime fan myself but I loved Cowboy Bebop and Vampire Hunter D.

     
  • At 7:56 PM, Blogger Brinstar said…

    Has Grandma seen any Miyazaki films?

     
  • At 9:17 PM, Blogger Master Yoshi said…

    My favorite anime movie as well as my favorite samurai movie is called Ninja Scroll. Great tit shots, great blood spray, and an actual ending! No stupid sequels! No video game that I know of though...and it's a shame too. I think it would make a great game. Check it out, even all the chicks I've shown this too love it! You'll definetly like it Granny.

     
  • At 9:24 PM, Blogger Mike Abundo said…

    Ever tried cosplay? Unlike American animation, Japanese animation has lots of cool grannies. ;)

     
  • At 2:55 AM, Anonymous Ethrin said…

  • At 12:11 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hey "Hardcore" Grandma...MNsaint here...
    There is a good game on the GC (game gube) playable on the Wii (of course) thats a touch of Anime but more RPG Plot/Great story...really deep (spans 2 GC disks)...called "Tales of Symphonia" by Namco check it out...

    gome on
    Don St. Hilaire

     
  • At 11:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Tales of Symphonia is one of favourites. Incredibly deep game.

     
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