Old Grandma Hardcore

This blog is the chronicle of my experiences with Grandma, the video-game playing queen of her age-bracket and weight class. She will beat any PS2, XBox, GameCube, etc., console game put in front of her, just like she always has. These are her stories. She is absolutely real. She lives in Cleveland.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Live G-Hole discussion thread with Grandma

Okay! Fire up your televisions, The G-Hole starts on MTV in just 30 minutes here on the East Coast (8:00pm). Grandma's review of Final Fantasy XII will be in this episode, although I'm not sure in which order the segments are. Tonight, we'll be bullshitting about Final Fantasy XII and whatever else your playing right here. It's an open thread, so pretty much anything goes.

So what's on your goddamn mind?!

[Archived Thread]

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Monday, November 13, 2006

Special broadcast of The G-Hole to air on MTV this week featuring Grandma's review of Final Fantasy XII

While getting our ass kicked by Guitar Hero II, we discovered that Grandma will once again be gracing your television screens when her review of FFXII appears on MTV's The G-Hole, in an episode that is scheduled to first air Wednesday, November 15th at 8:00pm EST. During the broadcast, we will hold a live discussion thread here at OGHC, giving you the chance to bullshit with Grandma the whole night as the episode crosses the continent, one time zone after another.

We were going to stay up anyway!

Here are the scheduled air dates if anyone without a DVR wants to catch it on either MTV or MTV2:

Wednesday 11/15/2006 8:00pm
Thursday 11/16/2006 10:00am
Thursday 11/16/2006 12:40am

Wednesday 11/15/2006 09:00pm
Wednesday 11/15/2006 02:00am
Thursday 11/16/2006 12:00pm
Thursday 11/16/2006 09:30pm
Friday 11/17/2006 12:30pm
Friday 11/17/2006 10:30pm
Saturday 11/18/2006 09:00pm
Saturday 11/18/2006 01:30am
Sunday 11/19/2006 03:30am

A lot of folks really worked hard to make the show work (well, not Grandma and I- really she just plays the games and god knows what the fuck I do), so please, PLEASE let us know what you think! Please join us Wednesday night for the discussion thread, it should be pretty interesting after we I start drinking.

Please tell us you'll be here, this means a lot to us, even if just to stop by that night and to say "hi."

Success of the show means Grandma and I keep working; if Grandma keeps working then she gets more money; if she gets more money then she can afford the new consoles (we're poor); if she can afford the new consoles then she'll be happy; if Grandma's happy then I can sleep at night. It all works out in the end :)

Game on!

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Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Video 17 - Grandma Plays Okami

Grandma is in the final stages of Okami, a beautiful platform game on the PS2 that was well deserving of its drawn out hype. The unique "Brush System" in the game is both beautifully done and incredibly frustrating at times; the new strokes one learns begin to layer themselves in such a way that one occasionally forgets the easiest way of battle in favor of newer methods, or at least those most recent in memory which tend to be the more complicated drawings.

Drawing using the thumbsticks isn't as easy as you'd hope it would be, so it takes some getting used to- but it's worth it. The saturation of color and form make the game, which functionally holds up on its own in gameplay, a true work of art- but you've probably already gathered that from over two years of E3 demos and teasers.

For Grandma, the worst aspect of the game would be the very "StarFox-esque" gibberish anima language that drums on your head during dialogue reading. It's a shame, really- the soundtrack is rather pretty, but sitting at the computer a few feet from where Grandma tortures herself trying to learn a new brush stroke is usually done in silence (other than Grandma's exclamations of course).

If you have a Playstation 2 and you dig the platform genre, you should own Okami.

That brings me to the other reason you shouldn't eat anything this week:

Grandma got her copy a few weeks ago when Square sent it over to be reviewed for The G-Hole. She violated one of her standing gaming rules by interrupting Okami to play FF:XII so the review would be ready by deadline, but there are no regrets when it comes to this game.


There is so much to say about XII but goddamit it will have to wait.

If there is any gas in your car; if your bus pass for November just kicked in; if you have the necessary funds to acquire it- GET IT.

It's magnificent.

We have a lot coming up, including our perspective on The Lumines Situation and the upcoming holiday battle of corporate entities.

Game on!

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