Old Grandma Hardcore

This blog is the chronicle of my experiences with Grandma, the video-game playing queen of her age-bracket and weight class. She will beat any PS2, XBox, GameCube, etc., console game put in front of her, just like she always has. These are her stories. She is absolutely real. She lives in Cleveland.

Monday, October 31, 2005

The Return Of The Ghost of Ask Grandma Hardcore Goes West

Happy Halloween everybody! What do you want to know? Open Forum! Open Bar! OPEN!


  • At 9:26 PM, Anonymous Anne Packrat said…

    You guys get a lot of tricker treaters up there?

    And is Grandma getting Dragon Quest VIII?

  • At 9:43 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    You never did clarify what's going on with MTV! So is grandma reviewing games for them now? Where can I see it?? TELL ME!! You tease :)

    Also, because it is Holloween and all, I'm naked.

  • At 9:49 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Has Grandma ever played Jade Empire? I got to the last battle last night and my nephew took his xbox back home today(little bastard) although he did offer to rent it to me until Christmas for $40. Just wondering if she knew how it ended.
    Game On!

  • At 9:56 PM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…

    Anne Packrat-

    Oh hell yes. The little bastards all running around asking for things... We make it a point to be vacant from the area while the rest of the family deals with them. The little kids I get, they're cool. It's that age inbetween innocence and maturity; the "middle schoolers" if you will that freak me out.

    Second question: God, I hope so!


    Can't say just yet. :) All will soon be revealed.

    And to your second point, congratulations!


    YES! Grandma got into KOTOR so she dug Jade Empire as well. She played through twice to see the differences between the way of the Open Palm and the way of the Closed Fist. She thought it was a little short overall, but good nonetheless. Do you want to know how it ends?

  • At 10:08 PM, Blogger Leci said…

    Mine's a question for Tim.. xD What were some of the things you dressed up as for Halloween?

  • At 10:42 PM, Anonymous citizenmuse said…

    I have a few questions/comments:

    1. Has Grandma beaten God Mode on God of War yet? I was wondering, seeing as the headline has been the same for awhile.

    2. Has Grandma ever played Tales of Symphonia for GC? My girlfriend and I are playing it right now, and its simply amazingly fun being a multiplayer RPG (now I know what Handoverfist was talking about!)

    3. I just wanted to say thank you Tim for mentioning me in one of the earlier posts. It made me sad (insert terrible crying face) that absolutely no one responded to my ealier comment, but when I read your posting for last Friday and saw the ENORMOUS number of responses to it, it made me all warm inside and gave me hope for a kinder, gentler nation... something to that effect. Anyways, I feel special, thanks for kicking ass as always and forever game on!


  • At 11:23 PM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…


    I was a pirate. Captain Hook. The long black haired Captain Hook. I gots lots of candy. I don't remember much after that :) I think maybe... zombie? Shit, I don't know.


    1. NO. It's fucking HARD :) Jesus, she has to mostly block rather than fight head on, it's a bitch. Hence the unchanging title.

    2. A fantastic, beautiful game. Of course!

    3. No problem! It was a great idea! I was curious too!

  • At 12:59 AM, Anonymous Gamer Phfreak said…

    Went and got Ratchet and Clank (Up Your Aresenal)for my anniversary last night! Just great! Whats Grandmas take the this duo?

  • At 2:10 AM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…

    gamer phfreak-

    "I don't know if it would make the best anniversery gift, but I LOVED the series! The next one is coming out soon as well I think. Very cool game! I tend to like Ratchet and Clank more than Jak and Daxter when I think about it. It was just more fun!"

  • At 12:36 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Yes, please, please tell me how Jade Empire ends. Since I didn't have $40 to give to the vampire nephew. thanks!~

  • At 3:18 PM, Anonymous Gamer Phfreak said…

    LOL It was a great gift for 2 gamers!

  • At 4:32 PM, Blogger HandOverFist said…

    Does grandma like the SSX series at all? I'm not really into many sports games but SSX and Blitz are very fun to me. Oh and Citizenmuse, I'm surprised you remember me saying that. I love Tales of Symphonia. My favorite.

  • At 7:05 PM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…


    Well, if you play the game according the Open Palm methods... well, here's Grandma: "Oh CHRIST, it's been a few months... let me think now... Okay, the master at the beginning, the one everyone thinks is so awesome, actually is a douchebag. The whole flashback story that tells what happens at the temple years ago turns out to be complete BULLSHIT, and she has to defeat him. Closed Fist.... well god DAMN, it wasn't that long ago, give me a minute! Okay, it's the same thing, but... well, you're EVIL I guess... I don't know! You know how many games I've played in between Jade Empire?? A LOT! I forget! I'm sorry! Shit, now I want to play it again..."

    gamer phfreak-

    "Once for my anniversery I got a toaster. I think Ratchet and Clank would have been better now that I think about it!"


    "NO! I SUCK at SSX! [laughs] It might look like an awesome game, but it was made to destory me!"

  • At 12:39 AM, Anonymous rpm said…

    Has grandma tried Dark Corners of the Earth yet?

  • At 2:38 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    hope i'm not too late, i'm just wondering what Grandma thought of the Grandia series of games? yes, i know it's old...i was just hoping to find out what she thought, if she'd ever played one of them...especially since Grandia 3 should be out sometime soon. (i probably won't get it down here in Australia *cries* we didn't get Grandia Xtreme either *cries again*)

  • At 7:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    does grandma need to get laid? ;)
    cause id do it

  • At 5:47 PM, Anonymous Loke said…

    Have Grandma tried the final fantasy series yet? I yes, what did you think about them and which of them did you like the most?

    -Loke From Norway.

  • At 1:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    greetings from germany
    >>>PS2 RuleZZZ <<<

  • At 12:53 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Has Granny ever performed Jade massage bedsbuy D3 items Business? I acquired towards the final battle last night and my nephew needed his xbox live home currently(very little bastard) while he do offer you to help book that in my opinion until eventually Holiday regarding $40. Simply thinkingCheap GW2 items if the lady knew operate finished.


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