Old Grandma Hardcore

This blog is the chronicle of my experiences with Grandma, the video-game playing queen of her age-bracket and weight class. She will beat any PS2, XBox, GameCube, etc., console game put in front of her, just like she always has. These are her stories. She is absolutely real. She lives in Cleveland.

Saturday, October 15, 2005

We Made Jack Thompson's Game, Await Confirmation of Payment to Charity

--UPDATE-- JACK RESPONDS --Scroll Down For More Information--

We did it, everybody- and you helped us out. I compiled the actionscripting today and finished the game about an hour ago, and then went through as much debugging as I could.

Here it is, for our submission to Jack's proposal and for your enjoyment:

Zork Thompson v1.0

Thank you everyone for helping us out with different ideas. Although they didn't really deviate much from our original script, they still helped us with structure and presentation. We did add some items and conditional endings, so if you want to take the time to look, they are certainly there for you.

As per the conditions of Jack's proposal, we have created and manufactured a game to meet his criteria, and will distribute it here for all freely (and if you like, you may take it and distribute it also) and if "selling" the game is also a factor, then we will appreciate any PayPal donations sent to my e-mail address.

It's your move, Jack.


Sunday Morning: We fixed some small browser and spelling errors, tried to e-mail Jack, but his public e-mail address on Stopkill bounces everything back. I Am Jack's Complete Lack Of Surprise.

Sunday Night: Fixed the interface problems of text-only clicking, so now it runs a little smoother, a little faster. I will call Jack tomorrow with the number provided by Stopkill. If that doesn't work, perhaps the Florida Bar Association will have a directory we can try. If you guys have any ideas for improving the game or additions, let me know.


Monday Morning: The always awesome Kotaku linked to us and Zork Thompson v1.0, so the game is being played by quite a few people! The Wikipedia entry for Jack Thompson now has a section for Jack's Proposal, and it lists other text-adventure games made in response at the same time we published ours, so you guys know what that means: great minds think alike, bitch!

So here they are, the list of text-adventure games the community has made in response to Jack's proposal:

Zork Thompson v1.0
Jack Thompson Presents... OSAKI!
A Modest Video Game Proposal
The Golden Rule: O.K.'s Revenge!

Each game addresses Jack's proposal to eat the young of the video game industry in its own way, so be sure to check each of them out. I e-mailed the folks who made "Jack Thompson Presents... OSAKI!" and we're pretty much in agreement as to the purpose of these games.

There you have it Mr. Thompson. The community has responded to you, Johnny-On-The-Spot as it were. Please respond to us, counselor.


I called the number provided on Stopkill this morning. Jack picked up quickly, said he was in another call and politely said he would call back the number on his Caller ID when he was finished.

And so he did.

We talked for about a half hour. There wasn't any screaming involved, and we both stayed fairly civil. Jack very much wanted to argue politics more than talk about his proposal. Some main points of the conversation: I stated I disagreed with Jack on a great many things, but that we could both benefit from this, for in his statement to Gamepolitics that claims the entirety of the proposal was satire on the likes of Swift, which would also mean that his offer of $10,000 to charity was also satire. If Jack would cough up the money, then at least he could save face. Also, our game has serious concequences for punching police officers and purhcasing guns for a murder. He changed the subject. He wondered what I meant when I said that I disagree with him on many things, and said it was because I don't actually know his positions, which he began to list.

I do know his positions, I did my research before we did this thing.

My disagreements with Jack were with Government regulation of video game sales, for starters. I don't believe the Government should get involved. He said they already do with alcohol and pornography, so they plausibly could. Alcohol, I said, shouldn't be sold to minors because it WILL cause harm. (Yes, I drink, I know the hypocrisy but I'm 22 and legal dammit!) Tobacco WILL cause harm. (Yes, I smoke Camel Turkish Royal, but I didn't start until college.) Pornography, like video games, I believe, is NOT harmful, and I think they should not have such regulation. He laughed at that one and called me a libertarian. Coming from Jack I have my doubts, but I took it as merely a classification rather than an insult.

Jack likes to use the phrase "you can't say with a straight face..." a LOT. I began to secretly make distorted, Kabuki theater expressions as I spoke to him, just to see if it were true.

We discussed other things about games, but here's the answer we've all been waiting for: "NO!"

Jack said we merely made a Flash game, not a First Person Shooter, and we are not "Moguls," we are not going to sell it in boxes at brick and mortar retail stores, and so we don't meet the criteria of his proposal (which, remember was a satire anyway, so I'm not sure why he's arguing semantics; ABOUT WHICH you will discover he was actually incorrect...) so you know what that means?

That means NO statement from Jack declaring the game made, and more importantly NO money for charity. As it turns out, we didn't read "I have a modest proposal for the video game industry. I'll write a check for $10,000 to the favorite charity of Take-Two Interactive Software, Inc's chairman, Paul Eibeler - a man Bernard Goldberg ranks as #43 in his book 100 People Who Are Screwing Up America - if any video game company will create, manufacture, distribute, and sell a video game in 2006 like the following..." carefully enough for Jack's liking, so the starving children don't get their money.

See, we followed the criteria TO THE LETTER. This site will remain online well into 2006, so consider the game done. Several times. With different results.

Jack is not paying.

It might be because Paul Eibeler gives money to a charity Jack doesn't approve of, like the EVIL folks at the ACLU or some such thing. (Note: I like the ACLU, I'd be a member if I could pay the $35.00 a year.) Jack may be trying to expose Paul as a crazy man who gives crazy money to crazy shit in the final breaths of battle, but who knows, he wouldn't tell me. "Call Paul Eibeler and talk to him" he says.

Damn, this is a lot of phone tag for a mesely $10 grand donation.

I told him that in the meantime, he should play our game, I've got the URL for it right here all handy like...

He said he didn't have time.

In his final words to me, he said "Like you said, we disagree on a great many things."


  • At 4:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…


    What can I say.

    Fantastic job, man. This is exactly what he needs.

  • At 4:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…


  • At 4:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    YES!! That was awesome! I know it's just your first draft, but I didn't find any input or continuity errors, so it's all good. Man, I hate when Jack Thompson tries to pull this shit and doesn't expect anyone to respond to him.

    Well now I guess he has a response, doesn't he?

    Good job, Tim and grandma!

  • At 4:59 PM, Blogger DY357LX said…

    Nice work. I look forward to the E.A style expansion pack(s). :)

    Again, nice work Tim and Grandma.

  • At 7:15 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Jack Thompson is a conceited, sad, little man.

    Zork Thompson is awesome!

    I love Zork Thompson.

  • At 7:31 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I don't get it - does anybody take this clown seriously?

    - mama lombax

  • At 8:54 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    That's awesome! Start researching charities my friend. Jack Thompson's gonna owe it some serious money.

  • At 11:47 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I think it's great, but somehow I doubt the dude will pay up.

  • At 12:35 AM, Blogger Collin said…

    That IS awesome. I was just reading about what Jack was up to now and was wondering if you had seen it. Obviously, you had. Good job. The only thing I would like is larger click areas. It seems I have to click right on a letter of a choice to advance the game.

  • At 12:52 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    i giggled out loud at the "examine grue". ^_^

  • At 5:38 AM, Blogger EazyCheeze said…

    SPOILERS! I think this is such a great game that people deserve this courtesy...

    For being only a day and a half's worth of work, this certainly was a beautiful game. It REALLY brought back to me days of playing Interactive Fiction back in the mid-80s, even though those used text parsers (these were games before mice were readily available, you know :) ) but clicking on phrases was just fine. I laughed as I boogied down with the FBI guys who were not in the least concerned with who I was, and I was chilled as I walked into the Wal-Mart after something terrible happened... I really did feel lucky to be alive, and I'm going to Wal-Mart this morning?! hah. Anyway, keep up the good work, and I love how all solutions that made progress involved no violence at all. Mr. Thompson, if he's true-to-form, will probably get all steamed up and say this is not how he wanted things to go, but you did what you could and that's all anyone can ask. Thanks for a great oldschool nostalgia trip and a great moralistic story with a great ending (the ultimate ending where Osaki goes home from E3, hugs his family and gives his daughter the teddy bear).

    Everyone here loves you and your grandma, Tim! And with good reason.


  • At 8:05 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Found a typo when trying to jump out the window

    "but your 10 floors up" your should be you're

    "first trip to Philidephia" should be "Philadelphia"

  • At 9:05 AM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…

    Okay, we fixed the spelling errors. Thanks guys! The spellchecker within Flash isn't the best one if you know what I mean. I am also incompetant. And smelly, don't forget smelly.

    Apparently Jack's e-mail address given at Stopkill simply bounces back Yahoo users, so we'll have to call him Monday I suppose.

  • At 10:45 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    According to wikipedia his email addy bounces back everyone.

  • At 12:18 PM, Blogger DY357LX said…

    Contact the guys at Penny-Arcade, they've been in touch with Jack and I think it's likely they've got his details written down somewhere. Probably next to the voodoo doll of him.

    Tim Buckley of CTRL+ALT+DEL Online might also have Jack's details but it's never been mentioned on the comic's main page.

    Good luck.

  • At 12:41 PM, Blogger HandOverFist said…

    Hah, loved the description of yourself there Tim. Good game, kind of like those interactive books from way back. Goodt times. Game on!

  • At 1:13 PM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…

    In the latest version (should be put up sometime tonight) we have better buttons so it isn't so text tight; and I hope we can get some illustrations for some of the screens here soon.

    The final version of this thing should be good enough to distribute, so if you have any ideas, let me know!!

  • At 4:32 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    It shall be linked by me! Ah, how I treasure it. Tim & Grandma FTW! ::grin:: ::hug::

    GAME ON!


  • At 9:56 PM, Blogger Jesse said…

    The game makes me want to go to Denny's something fierce.

    Wait, does that mean a video game is having an affect on my behavioral and thought patterns? Crap....

  • At 10:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Came here via Kotaku, so you know.

    Good on you guys for providing links to the other text games, that was more than you had to do.

    I just hope it doesn't divulge into a "this game was better than this one" thing, and people remember what this is about. You are calling Jack Thompson's bullshit.

    FANTASTIC job on Zork Thompson, by the way. I got to E3 with the MacGuyver DVDs :)

  • At 12:07 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Simply awesome. You and Grandma perfectly captured the humor I love from text adventures (hehe grue) while simultaneously delivering a giant slice of humble-pie to ol' Jacky Boy.

    Just a note: if you feel like doing another update to the game, as of 9:00 pacific time, there's still a few spelling and grammar bugs near the E3 section. The most serious one is that the concerned gamer girl in the E3 queue apparently has Osaki's ticket in her hand as she enters the building.

    Rock on!

  • At 5:39 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Top game.
    I particularly liked the Grue's appearance :)

    - A Rockstar employee

  • At 1:03 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Tim, great game, but I personally like The Golden Rule: OK's Revenge the best. It's so easy just read and click through and the ending is truly golden. Again, good job, and may the wrath of God fall upon Jack Thompson and his kinsmen for many ages to come.

  • At 1:27 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    This is basically perfect. high five!

  • At 2:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I didn't read Jack Thompsons proposal as a dare on every little blogging programmer in the world, rather the established gaming industry, which - I'm sorry - ypu don't constitute.

    So I understand how he denies the game being produced. I understand the validity of your gag, but it is nothing more than that, a gag. Congrats on thousands of hits.

    That said, someone SHOULD set JT straight in some way. This is just not that final nail in the coffin.

  • At 3:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    this is awesome! you guys have done great work. Also, because of these games, and jack thompson, PA went and did something on there own:

    "We've just made the donation you never would, and never meant to. Ten thousand dollars' worth. And we made it in your name."


  • At 3:40 PM, Blogger Sith Librarian said…

    Somehow I didn't think Jack would pay the money if someone made the game.

    But then again, being charitable is a human emotion. Jack wouldn't know that.

  • At 4:25 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I agree with anonymous up there. As you yourself quoted: " - if any video game company will create, manufacture, distribute, and sell a video game in 2006".

    It clearly says "video game company", so that at least gave him leverage to ignore your attempt.

    Nice try anyways!

  • At 4:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…


    Looks like someone had the balls to donate.

  • At 4:47 PM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…

    I can surely see what some of you are saying. We are not technically a video game company, and it isn't 2006- but these are not the reasons that Jack Thompson has refused to give money to charity.

    He told me we don't qualify because it was a flash text based game, not a first person shooter. Also I am not defined as a "mogul." He told me I didn't even know what a mogul was. I responded "well Jack, why don't you define it for me." Apparently it means one with "a lot of money." He nailed me on that one, I'm broke as a joke.

    Did we expect Jack Thompson to pay up? No. Not at all. But just to be fair, we gave him the chance to do it this way rather than for him to fall even harder in the coming months. He could have saved face, but he chose to do some crazy shit: SAY THE GAME DID NOT CONTAIN COMPONENTS CLEARLY OUTLINED IN THE PROPOSAL THAT NEVER APPEARED IN THE PROPOSAL!!

    In the words of Max Beerbohm: "What the shit is that?"

    I'll tell you guys one thing though- the other guys that made text games, they were thinking the same thing. This guy never specified genre, call his bluff, when he refuses to pay the charity, the folks on his side begin to question his tactics, more respect is earned for the gaming community.

    And I'm sorry Jack, I know you told me you found that term "humorous" but there is a gaming community.

    Then there were the folks that created the San Andreas Mod featuring Jack. A lot of work went into that thing! Do you think they thought Jack would pay up? Probably not. We KNOW Jack Thompson, even though he states that we have common misconceptions about his positions. We know him intimately, for this fucker has been stalking those within and supporting the games industry with his soundbites.

    I agree with you guys who are saying we don't perfectly fit the criteria, and thus he shouldn't have to pay, I understand this. However, in the principle of the matter, we all made games complying to his request, matching him satire for satire. The question is this: why would someone lie about donating money to charity?

    THIS is the question we are dying to have answered.

    Jack Thompson could have looked at any of our games, or the GTA mod, declare this over and pay a charity just out of the kindness of his heart. He didn't.

    It's like a doctor refusing to perform surgery because the family of the patient doesn't dance properly at their bedside, arguing that he required Ballet excellence when all they could give was a jig.

    More on this coming later...

  • At 6:19 PM, Blogger Good Ol' WT said…

    What's it matter what Jack Thompson thinks anyway? Let him make his claims, lie about donations and file frivilous lawsuit after lawsuit. None of it changes the fact that he's the lowest form of 'net life: the guy who threatens people with violence over the internet.

  • At 6:25 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Defamation of Character is closer to what Jack wanted, as San Andreas is sold and it's easily accessed.

  • At 6:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Is there any way of taking Jack to court over his verbal contract that he's not sticking to? :)

  • At 6:32 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Personally, I couldn't be more delighted how this all turned out. Jack Thompson screeches out some kind of ridiculous, hideous, repellent proposal to gamers at large - not specifically the industry, but everyone who'd ever enjoyed a game - with a $10,000 donation to charity at stake. I'm sure there were those eager to make a game just to rub it in his face, but I know that just as you and Grandma did, Tim - many people saw a chance to help others (no matter how hateful the packaging Thompson tried to put it in), and did their best to make this come to pass... even attempting to educate those who seemed to have such bounless ire for a legitimate form of art and entertainment. Thompson gibbered at us to make with the game, and we did.

    And then, as I expected, he refused to pony up. "Oh, it was SATIRE," he hisses - one of the last refuges of the ignorant is to claim they were doing something smarter (that they often, and especially in this case, have no CLUE about). "Oh, and also this doesn't qualify, because it isn't X." Well, you never said it had to be X in your original annoucement, Jack. And since you never attempt to discriminate between types or ratings or genres in your general denouncement of video games, why start now? I saw him weaseling out of this from the word GO - just as I knew there would be dozens out there who would respond to his hateful challenge with a challenge of their own: making the game and asking for him to keep his part of the bargain. I knew he would behave in the immature, hateful, sensationalist way he always has and weasel out of it - denying the $10K to those who would need it.

    But lo and behold: Tycho and Gabe weren't about to let that stand. THIS, I am surprised by - but not a whole ton. Jerry and Mike are such amazingly good-hearted guys, and if I had the means I would match their donation. As it stands: I think we should toss up a PayPal site and follow in the footsteps of PA, and set up our OWN donation (putting money aside for Child's Play as well, of course). If we can band together for a charitable cause - as gamers have before - to make a difference in the lives of the needy and suffering... that would be the very best way for all this to wrap up.

    (and if it shuts up Jack Thompson for good, well: so much the better!)

    GAME ON!


  • At 6:56 PM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…


    I have so much respect for the guys at Penny Arcade for their actions in this debacle. They stood their ground against this guy and let him talk his way into the position he took today. Penny Arcade has done more for charity than Jack Thompson could ever fathom. What's more is they are gamers who have a large slice of the gaming community as fans. That community, with the job that the PA duo at the helm, made Child's Play one of the proudest moments in our PA fan history.

    I mean god DAMN they raised a lot of money.

    They also have a lot more together at PA then we do over here, and I don't want to steal any of their thunder. Whatever they are doing, they are doing it RIGHT, and adding additional PayPal donation sites might complicate things a bit. If anyone wants to donate to a PA charity like Child's Play, go over to Penny Arcade and give them a hand. I fear we may just slow down the momentum.

    There has been talk of bundling a bunch of the text adventure game responses to Jack's proposal, along with some new ones (if any of you want to give it a go) together and selling them as sort of a novelty package at a few stores, and donating THAT money to charity. I would certainly be all for that.

    Anonymous, you mentioned "Defamation of Character," and YES, just the screenshots I saw showed a lot of quality in that thing. Those modders certainly deserved a response from Jack, and they got it as well. VERY well done, guys.

    Ask Grandma Hardcore is going to be tomorrow night instead of its usual time tonight, so we can keep this story bumped for all the news articles linking to it. Grandma is playing Growlanser Generations right now, and there is A LOT to say about it! We are just getting started in this game, and we are going to be back to business as usual for us here at OGHC here soon.

    We made a tiny contribution to this whole ordeal. The guys that made the SA Mod made another, the community of text adventure writers made theirs as well, all the gaming blogs have done an excellent job of reporting the mess from start to finish, and the Tycho and Gabe finished the man off with a donation of their own.

    Penny Arcade has always been cool, it has only gotten better.

  • At 7:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    DoC also came out a week BEFORE Thompson made the press release. Those guys hate him on general principle.

  • At 8:30 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Tim, Defamation of Character was great and all, but dude it wasn't at all a response to Jack Thompson's proposal like yours. I think anonymous above is right, it was a week before his proposal.

    Don't sell yourself short, man- Zork Thompson was a great satire.

    Jack deserves the negative attention he gets for dismissing you.

    And technically, you made a video game, so you are now a video game company, so you fit the criteria. Congratulations on your new company :)

  • At 10:53 PM, Blogger Tony said…

    It's been said a bunch of times before, but this is sweet, you rock. Keep up the good work and keep fighting the good fight.

  • At 6:28 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    We should all get his e-mail addy, they start something on line where we get a whole whack of people to e-mail him every day and harass him to make good on his offer. Perhaps even get a few lawyers involved.

  • At 8:29 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    How much does it cost to register a company in USA?
    Burn it to some CD´s, make some boxes and make a deal with a local gaming store to sell 10 copies or something like that.

  • At 10:15 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I have to weigh in on the side of Jack on this one, and that's sad. Honestly, while I agree that he's not doing anything positive to protect kids, I also think he's right on the terms of his "proposal."

    He shouldn't have to define it as "a video game company that actually puts boxes on shelves and consistently puts out hits, thus having a wide fan-base." I honestly think that "video game company" at least implies that you're incorporated. Now, if you had a company that was actually properly funded to start up a game development studio and not a sham company, then I could see how his other added terms would be utter bullshit.

    And quite honestly, they may be utter bullshit. But the thing is that his proposal does say "video game company" and the past targets of his ire should indicate something of what he meant.

    I by no means support Jack Thompson, which is why typing all of this has made me throw up a little bit in my mouth. However, as an attorney, I can sort of understand how this guy's mind is working in response to your game and request that he pay Eibel's charity.

    So consider it a glimpse into the mind of a madman, I dunno. Some of what Thompson says is, at its core, right or at least reasonable. The problem is that it is so heavily coated in batshit insane that it loses all things that are possibly even a bit good.

  • At 10:57 AM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…


    I hear what you're saying. Also, it's important to point out that in no way was Jack's proposal legally binding. Someone could say "I'll reward you if you find my dog" and then when the dog is returned say "I have no money" and there is little you can do. I felt, however, that the strength of our request for the donation to charity should match his request for the game to be made.

    The game he requested, in his eyes, will never be made. The money for charity via Jack Thompson, in my eyes, will probably never happen. But everyone once again exposed him for what he is.

    In the end, this guy really doesn't matter. I would rather have an simple discussion with someone about the rating system in games and its usefulness to parents. There are quite a few good people out there that are convinced that games are extremely damaging to youth. I think a kid's motivation to do harm to someone is completely different in a case by case basis. It's a question of maturity, and the parent's ability to ascertain that maturity in their child before they let them play GTA III or read John Laurence's masterpiece "The Cat from Hue." Both things can have the same effect on the wrong sort of child.

    cmdrslack, I would love some reason to be interjected in all this. That's why the game Grandma and I made is full of consequences. But you're right. And saying he shouldn't have to pay the charity isn't necessarily defending Thompson, it's simply deciphering the logic of our arguments and taking a position, yes? So you don't have to throw up in your mouth. I know it's early, but drink some vermouth or something, man- it'll make you feel better :)

    A lot of other folks are asking this question, but I'll ask you guys: why conditionally donate money to charity? Why only donate, if you can afford it, ONLY if something happens that meets your standards?

    The guys at Penny Arcade didn't even need prompting, they did that on their own!

    So why won't Jack? He doesn't even have to admit defeat, he can just say he's donating anyway so as not to be an asshole. He could donate to some other charity rather than one Paul Eibeler chooses. What does he have to lose?

  • At 11:04 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    There's no point in registering your company. He didn't plan to pay in the beginning and it's not like he's going to pay if you do register. Let's not forget though that the main games that Thompson accuses for destroying character are not of the fps genre but more third person action/shooter. No matter how much most gamers play Grand Theft Auto their ability with a real rifle is still limited to only knowing where the trigger is. Not to mention, at how many lans have you people been to where actual violence occurs. Simply put this guy is an attention grabbing whore and I'd like to say well done to the guys at PA and I'll be going to your website now. You've inspired me give too.

  • At 12:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    CtrlAltDelete, I agree with some of the comments that Jack doesn't have to pay, but you need to set things straight with people.

    This thing is pretty big on the net right now, and a lot of folks are getting it wrong, even you (which baffles me).

    Folks are saying that Defamation of Character was the response to Jack's proposal, not Zork Thompson or any of the other text games, even Penny Arcade and Gamepolitics say this.

    I don't know why you're shooting yourself in the foot by just agreeing with that and letting it go.

    I came here via The Inquirer, by the way, in case you didn't know how big this has gotten. They got it right in their article, so why don't you correct other people? You wouldn't be mean or anything you would just be setting things straight.

    Anyway, cheers on the game man. It was an excellent read!

  • At 12:26 PM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…


    I'll tell you why, because Penny Arcade gave $10,000 to charity :) Those guys did something incredible, I made a little flash game. It doesn't help our purpose for all this if we bicker about the games. We all need to see and show Jack Thompson for what he is.

    An attention whore who cracks a joke about donating money to charity.

    The Penny Arcade guys deserve all of our respect.

  • At 12:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    And now Jack Thompson is trying to get them arrested.

    I can't even think of anything to add to that. It pretty much stands on its own.


  • At 1:22 PM, Blogger matt said…

    Props on 'Zork Thompson'! It reminds me of when I made text adventures in QBASIC before I knew about the SCREEN, LINE, and CIRCLE statements.

    Jack Thompson needs to apologize or something if he ever wants to be credible again.

    Those two at Penny Arcade, Tycho and Gabe, have really earned a great deal of respect with the way they have handled their confrontations with Thompson. I've been kinda worried that all of this is going to blow up in our sane faces some how, and mr. crazy is going to end up on top. But it looks like he will be the one to overstep legal bounds first if things continue on.

  • At 3:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Actually, CtrlAltDelete, I believe that you are mistaken. Jack's words constitute a verbal contract, as would a promise to pay a reward if I helped you to find your dog. The only thing that a verbal contract requires is a witness. And in Jackie Boy's case, he has a whole heapin' helpin' of those.

    To prove that it was he who posted the comment about paying a sum of money to charity is not hard in court. Subpeona his ISP records.

    And then, considering the fact that he attached no real conditions as to the nature of the game or of the company that produced it, and considering the fact that someone went to all the trouble of actually taking his challenge, I believe that he has successfully placed himself "on the hook" for 10K.

    Not to mention the fact that some people at the FBI might perhaps like to talk to him about his thinly vieled threat levelled at the head of the ESA.

    And this friends is why most lawyers are extremely careful about what they say and who they say it to. Especially when they are making statements that are within the public view.

  • At 3:27 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Good on you, OGH! I have to commend you for your clever response to Jack's proposal, and for matching his pathetic "satire" with a bit of briliant satire of your own. You deserve all the accolades that you receive.

    And respect as well for the PA guys. The charitable donation and their handling of Jack was excellently done. And they have done a wonderful thing in creating Child's Play. I may just be a poor student, but I've gave everything I could to Child's Play last year and I will again this year. Gamers everywhere! Support Child's Play! Lets show the world just how wrong Jack is about the gamer community.

  • At 3:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    The lack of morals here is so typical. Go on and play your little games and pretend it doesn't effect anyone.

  • At 3:55 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    anonymous, did you come here for a flame war? Because I don't think you're going to get one. Sorry.

    Maybe if you played the game you would understand a bit more what they are trying to do.

    God bless.

  • At 4:02 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Anonymous, or... Mr. Thompson, I presume?

  • At 8:30 PM, Blogger Glenn said…

    Not to get too semantic on you but...

    You have not sold the game in 2006.

    That was one of his criteria. *grin*

  • At 5:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Damn technicalities. They'll getcha every time. *g*

  • At 7:47 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Your "game" didnt meet the criterias in any fucking way. To call it a game is already a joke. So what are you complaining about? Learn how to make real killer games!

  • At 9:30 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hahaha. Good job with the game. You should get some press release for this too. Consider contacting major US newspapers.

    Anonymous >> Here is the definition of Game for you: "An activity providing entertainment or amusement; a pastime" - dictionary.com. So... how is this NOT a game?

  • At 4:01 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I think I can safely say that most people in the gaming community on hearing Jack's proposal thought two things:
    Firstly, no legitimate game company was (or is) going to sink millions of dollars into a game that is all revenge killing for it's own sake and very little plot (well maybe Running with Scissors, and whoever made Manhunt, but I digress).
    Secondly I think most people thought, that would be a pretty crappy game. I'm sure plenty of us have played games like postal at one time or another, and they are fun for their shock value but there's a reason they've never reached the upper echelons of game credibility and it's got very little to do with the ridiculous amount of violence contained therein.

    Honestly I think making it illegal for kids to buy adult games makes sense, I'm not necessarily saying that these games are going to mess kids up but I can see that many people disagree and so think that it makes more sense for the buying of games to be a conscious decision on the parent's part rather than putting the onus (sp?) on them to make sure their kids *don't* buy the games? (Was that convoluted enough?)

    What I totally and unequivocally disagree with is attacking the game compsnies, sure they make the games, the publishers put it on the shelves. But how are they at all involved in the part where the game goes from the shelves to the kids? Paul Eibner isn't standing in EB (Not Gamestop in Australia.... yet) slipping GTA:SA to 10 year olds out of a trenchcoat. If big ol' JT was serious about making laws to protect children he would be focussing on the stores.

    While I'm on this rant, why does he feel the need to attack gamers themselves anyway? Are we doing something wrong? He seems to constantly need to refer to gamers as idiots etc. (and I'm not going to pull out the schtick that gamers are generally geekier and therefore more intelligent than the general population, I don't think it's that true anymore anyway but more importantly the intelligence of adults playing video games is not even relevant to the discussion of whether children should play them).

    Ok Rant off, sorry for messin up your site CAD.

  • At 11:19 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…


    60 comments. woah. haven't checked out the site for a while.

    i wanted to drop a line and say i don't want to lose touch. we did for a while there but i'm going to the peacecorps at the end of this school year and when i get back i still want to know you and stay in touch. so yeah, i figured a blog post would be cool.

    Other than that, i'm really fucking busy with school...eh...senior year.

    how's life? outside of OGHC and all.

    oh and watch it with that picture of the two little kids playing in the dirt, it looks like one of the ones i used at globalgiving and might have been paid for, you might want to switch it out with one in the public domain.

    ya libertarian!

  • At 11:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Mr. Thompson is such an asshole.

    I still find it amazing how governament allows such an amoral and dishonest people have authority and abuse it to do whatever they want against whatever they just simply say it's bad with no back arguement. He owes us all a hundred apologies, but his big (and obvious) ego and pride gets in the way of having dignity and do what's right. I'm so glad his permamently disbarred now. I bet his in the inside totally humilliated, butthurt and looking for revenge against the video game industry. Ahh, too bad it won't ever happen, Mr. Thompson. :)

    Good game by the way. It made me get into the character's feelings and emotions and further reflect upon the videogames and it's supposed consecuences on people.

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