Old Grandma Hardcore

This blog is the chronicle of my experiences with Grandma, the video-game playing queen of her age-bracket and weight class. She will beat any PS2, XBox, GameCube, etc., console game put in front of her, just like she always has. These are her stories. She is absolutely real. She lives in Cleveland.

Monday, March 06, 2006

The Return of Ask Grandma Hardcore

So, you want an open thread to post Grandma questions, eh?
Very well!

Let's see how long we can stay awake.


  • At 10:22 PM, Anonymous Sam said…

    I've been waiting to get a hold of you! You don't answer your email as much anymore, so I guess you guys are busy. Tim, I guess this is a question for you. You said there was a blog deal that fell through, that you guys didn't want to change sites and everything and put ads up and I have to wonder about the background on that, or is that too personal?

  • At 10:23 PM, Anonymous Varonika said…

    Checking in! :)

    I'm one of the ones that asked for an ask Grandma night and can't even think of a question yet...

    Just want you to know how much I enjoy this blog...

    Love ya Grandma!

  • At 10:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    So how is Grandma doing these days, health wise?

  • At 10:37 PM, Anonymous D said…

    Dear Grandma,
    a) what's the scariest game you ever played?
    b) will it make me wet my pants?
    (I'm a wimp but I have a relatively strong bladder)

  • At 10:45 PM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…


    I don't want to get TO into it; but I will say the folks that contacted me were nice, fairly understanding, and just wanted to give us the opportunity to expand. They weren't assholes with an adgenda, it simply looked like something that would work out for everybody. We just like doing things our way a bit better. They were really nice, actually. Grandma and I considered it, but it took a lot of talking to come to the conclusion to keep things as they are.


    Thanks! We love company here in crazy-world so stay with us!


    Her back has been killing her recently, for some reason. She doesn't get out of a chair without grimacing. We get out of the house as much as we can so she moves to keep it from getting worse; right now it's just a lot of annoying pain. It pisses her off!


    a) "Oh, shit... I think it would be a toss up between Fatal Frame II: The Crimson Butterfly" and "Condemned..." The Resident Evil and Silent Hill series were great, but they weren't TOO scary."

    b) "It depends on how much you drink before hand. Chances are you'll chicken out and make frequent bathroom trips to break up the... you know, FLOW of things- so it won't be too bad!"

  • At 11:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    What does Grandma think about the PSP?

  • At 11:17 PM, Blogger avid x3ro said…

    i just want to ask grandma if she is enjoying the xbox 360 achievement system. And does she find it rewarding or overated.

    Thanks Tim.

    - Peace.

  • At 11:24 PM, Blogger Forza_Motorsport_King said…

    Hey Tim and Grandma. I just love your blog. It kicks ass. I'm playing Zelda: Ocarina of Time, was wondering if GHC has played it and what she thinks of it. It sucks that I don't have a rumble pack, but I still love the game.



  • At 11:43 PM, Anonymous Annalisa said…

    Hey Tim and Grandma, I just started reading this blog last week (in fact I only just got back into gaming).

    I wanted to know if Grandma's excited about the Compilation of FFVII series? Besides Dirge, I've also been reading a lot about Before Crisis and Crisis Core, and both are really interesting, but I'm kind of depressed that they are only going to be released on mobile phones and PSP respectively. I heard Crisis Core might be about the Nibelheim incident from Zack's perspective, and I really want to play that. :/ What do you guys think about them releasing the games in the series on so many different formats?

  • At 11:46 PM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…


    Oooooo... All I can say is she wants one. BADLY. If for nothing else, for LUMINES. She likes the bigger screen. She played a little Liberty City Stories when we were in NYC for MTV. She thought it was wonderful!

    avid x3ro-

    "Tim thinks the achievement system is a conspriracy by Bill Gates to trick folks into thinking harder. I like it! It makes every game an arcade game, so to speak; and I know if my grandkids are lying if they tell me they're further than they are, so that's nice. Some things aren't necessary, though. Why does anyone deserve the first achievement in HexicHD? If you play it for five minutes pressing random buttons you'll still GET it. It's a tease!"


    "Don't even mention Zelda to me right now, I'm so pissed. Did you hear when they've FINALLY decided to release the next one?! What the FUCK?!! Anyway, Ocarina of Time was one of the better ones. I'd go confiscate my old N64 just to play it again."

  • At 11:53 PM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…


    "That's sort of... that's a tricky question. I know a lot of folks that only got into Final Fantasy after VII came out for the PSOne. Remember, it really started with Nintendo. Right now I'm playing FFIV on the DS; I might even go pick up an old copy of FF Tactics if I see it. I'm curious about Dirge, but at the same time I'm sorta scared. Final Fantasy VII was a fantastic game, so why fuck with it? You notice that Dirge and even Advent Children only came out after we all screamed that FF-X2 was so fucking HORRIBLE, and wished for better days. I don't know, if I end up getting a PSP, it won't matter much; but I understand the frustration if you're hooked on a series and they decide to cross-platform the thing to death. A lot of folks were pissed they had to shell out $100 for a GameCube when Resident Evil 4 came out, but it all worked out in the end. I'll tell you what I'd like to see, though. I'd like to see a giant compilation of all the Final Fantasy games from the original up to FFVIII (didn't care for 9 as much) on the PS3. Why use all the graphics power and memory capability only for graphics? Why not use it for LENGTH? I guess no one listens to me though ;)"

  • At 12:38 AM, Anonymous KC said…

    Grandma doesn't have a PSP?! Aw,I wish I could get her one,but I am 13 and very broke.

    Lumines is cool.It kills me though.My sister is really good at the game(she almost beat it),and it bugs me and my dad to no end.

    Any games you guys are looking forward to for the PS3? I want DMC4 and that Sonic game.

    Good luck getting that PSP,Grandma.

  • At 1:19 AM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…


    Oh, don't worry about getting her one; we will eventually (they're still a little too pricey for us).

    As far as the PS3 goes:

    "Metal Gear. Jesus FUCK: METAL GEAR. I have a feeling it's going to be fantastic!!"

  • At 6:02 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I'm wondering what your thoughts are on gamefly? I haven't rented a video game since NHL 96 for the Sega Genesis, but I'm thinking this might be a more cost effective measure than buying games, even used ones at eb games.


  • At 12:30 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I had a question, and I forgot it as soon as I opened this little thingee up. Still, I can give you the obligatory good work on the blog thing, so it's not a total loss.

    Also, you mentioned looking forward to Metal Gear on ps3. Until that comes out, here's a little something for you to have a look at:

  • At 3:54 AM, Anonymous blackroseowl said…

    Hey Grandma, I have a question. What did you think when you first heard that the XBox 360 was only going to have limited backwards compatibility? (If I've used the wrong word, then what I meant was, only plays some of the regular XBox games but not all). I was awfully unimpressed myself, since when the PS2 first came out it had full backwards compatibility for all PS1 games, and that was a few years back!

    Also, my parents have offered to buy me a PSP for Christmas, but I've noticed several times in this blog that you make references to the DS. Which one would you recommend me getting - ask my parents for a DS instead, or stick with the PSP?

    Much love from all your fans here in Aus and Oceania! Love, Jen (blackroseowl)

  • At 2:10 PM, Blogger DY357LX said…

    My question to Grandma:

    This month marks some awesome games for the X-Box 360.. alas with good news comes bad. I can only afford one. I'm torn between The Outfit, Ghost Recon 3 and Oblivion.

    All of them look good in their own special way but, alas again, come with negative points. For example.

    Ghost Recon 3 - looks like a complicated HUD and Full Spectrum Warrior pissed me off. (Too tactical!)

    Oblivion - Apparently the draw-distance is piss-poor. I played Morrowind on the pc and uninstalled it after 20 minutes. I have World Of Warcraft for my RPG goodness.

    The Outfit - It's Mercenaries with fancier graphics and stuff. The demo is dull as hell.

    Help a brutha out Grandma

  • At 4:16 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    does grandma like kingdom hearts? because its coming out at the end of the month!

  • At 1:40 PM, Anonymous Rebecca said…

    What are your proudest gaming achievments? Like beating a certain seemingly impossible boss or so :)

  • At 9:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Does Grandma have a favorite Royal Present? [a-la-Katamari Damacy]

  • At 2:21 PM, Anonymous Jeroen said…

    Hello, my questions to Grandma:

    what are her thoughts on the new nintendo Revolution, what does she think about the controller, it should give us some great gameplay videos of Grandma =).

    Zelda Twilight Princess, I take it she already saw the screenshots, rumours are the game will last over 100 hours. Is she able to peacefully wait till the game comes out? I sure aren't, I want that game sooooo bad.

    Well forgive my crappy english, greetings from the Netherlands,

    Jeroen, Game on!

  • At 12:26 PM, Blogger Seithon said…

    Have to know this,
    Is gran going to be getting Oblivion for the 360?
    She has to! :D

  • At 4:45 AM, Blogger CtrlAltDelete said…


    We've looked into Gamefly and even some of the "membership programs" for gamers at the local joints, but the fact of the matter is- Grandma gets some of her games from MTV, but we're never quite sure which ones or when. She doesn't feel right calling up and asking "Hey, um... I really want that one game, could you send it over?" so she just breaks down one day and goes to GameStop and picks up a copy. It's an impulsive sort of thing.

    Dear anonymous @ 12:30am

    Re: Newgrounds flash animation





    "You and I already talked about the PSP and the DS in an e-mail so I'll just... They're working on getting the 360 backwards for more games, but you're right. I can see how it's frustrating, I guess. When I would switch between systems before I would just hit a button; but to switch between the 360 and the XBox I have to change the channel from Input 1 to Component, change the Surround Sound from Video to TV/Cable, ...so it adds more steps. I just hope they get some of my favorite XBox games emulated in the future in case my old one ever dies."


    "I definitely want to get the new Ghost Recon after playing the last one that Ubisoft sent us; I think there is a lot to the squad based games that separate them from your normal FPS games. Ubisoft has always been pretty good when it comes to that. Oblivion is a definite. If I have to drive to Bethesda to get a copy I WILL. It's not like it's that far, only about six hours or so. The Outfit just looks silly. I don't know what it is, but it looks like a silly game."


    "Of course I love Kingdom Hearts! It has it's haters, but I'm really excited about the sequel!"


    "See now they have me all confused with the 360's achievement points. I guess overall, I'd have to say defeating Ruby Weapon as quickly as I did qualifies back in FFVII. Emerald was hard but with Ruby you only have one dude. For the "Achievement Points" I'd have to look back at Geometry Wars and see what the hardest one so far on that would be."


    "THE CAMERA!!"


    "I HAVE to try the Revolution (if that's what they're still calling it.) At first I wasn't sure about the new controller but I have to say I'm curious.

    I want the new Zelda as much as you do but with all the delays I don't know if it will EVER be released! The last one was gorgeous. I should take Wind Waker out again just for the hell of it."


    "YES!! The trailers look beautiful, but I HAVE to try that game. I want to see what a 360 RPG is going to look like. And they got fucking Patrick Stewart! Cool!!"

  • At 1:52 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    2 questions.

    Is it true Grandma was a machinist for B&D? I did some similar type work for ITW (Illinois Tool Works) and I was curious to know how she liked it (and what she thought)?

    2 when (if ever) do you think she'd ever do some PC gaming? There are some awesome titles for the PC (most recently F.E.A.R. for shooter) and Galactic Civ 2 (she'd have fun building her own ships) but I realize she's a hardcore console player.

  • At 11:08 AM, Anonymous Daniel said…

    Hey there Tim & Grandma

    Ive been following your blog forever! ,this is my first time posting ,but i feel i must post atleast once ,grandma and tim ,you guys are just that cool :)

    by now there is slim chances of getting a question answered but thats cool,so before i ask i'll just say that you guys rock and just keep doing what your doing dont let anything change!

    ok question time..
    its mid march and there are almost no decent games coming out but alot of teasers and upcoming games, how do you spend these times? myself personally i tend to play alot of my better games from last year but it drives me nutts waiting for new games with huge hype ...

    Daniel ,16

  • At 10:31 AM, Anonymous Chandrasutra said…

    When is grandma going to show us how she kills a collusus?

    (or did I miss that?)

  • At 10:32 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    colossi, I meant.

  • At 6:20 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hey Tim.. Videos from 1-3 are dead .. Plz upload them one more time.. :) I really want to watch them

    And can U update ure "track_listing.txt"
    Adding to it names of SoundTracks from 12-15 videos ( especially from 12 ;) )

    Thank U :)

  • At 2:07 PM, Blogger Müzik Dinle said…

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    müzik dinle mp3müzik dinle

  • At 12:26 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hey there!! Its taken me awhile, but i finally got up the nerve to finally post a comment. XD
    I've always wondered. Has grandma played video games ever since they came out? Like those old old game systems back in the 80s?

    Also...how's she doing anyways. I almost freaked out seeing her in that hospital bed. I swear...I wish my grandma was like that....she has cursed a few times. My other grandma told me and i quote 'Shut up...shut up ya little bitch'. XD She was sick and didn't know what she was talking about anyways...but it made me laugh her cursing. I hope your grandma does better. My family really loves to watch her with her YouTube shots. ^^ You've got a special grams, but I wouldn't trade mine for anything either. (I tell her that too, and I get spoiled for it. XD) have a great day, night, whener ya read dis sucker.

    Grandma, YOU KICK ASS!!! Don't ever change!!

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